Friday, September 17, 2010

Frustrated Friday

I am in a bad mood and I am stressed...and frustrated.  And all of this makes me restless.
It's not a pleasant feeling.
What I'm in a bad mood over is ridiculous.  Completely ridiculous.
So I went to the mall and finally the two cds I want were there.
See I have this problem with going into HMV and they have cds 2 for $20 (I only buy cds when they are $10 each by the way) but usually one of the cds I want is never there (Metric's 'Fantasies' or Florence + The Machines's 'Lungs')
Today, both of those albums were there.
But then this silly girl went into her purse and realized that she left her bank card in her sweater pocket when she bought gas.  She left her sweater on her bed.
She only had five bucks in her wallet.  Enough to buy shave gel but she was too depressed to go and buy some.

Before all of that happened she went to Winners and tried on two dresses.  She loved the skirt of one of them so much.  It had alternate layers of tiger print and black chiffon.  Except when she went to put it on the stupid elastic waist was too high and made her look stumpy and apple shaped.  These dresses are made for shorter people.  I am bummed.

Stupid reasons to be bummed, I know.

And I'm stressed because I want to apply to film school and have found two to apply to.  Except I'm nervous out of my mind and I need to apply by something like October 20th.
I never get nervous like this.  And this is just thinking about applying.  It hurts my chest and makes me want to cry and throw up.
I want it so bad.
I need to get reference letters and make an audition tape.
I'm nervous about the audition tape and I don't even have to do it in front of anyone!
It's just, I have done any acting in so long and whenever I try I do worse, so I need to remember to act natural and not force it.
Writing that kind of eased the tension.
Next week I'll go talk to my drama teacher from high school, ask for a reference and what I should do for an audition.  Tomorrow I'll get some acting books at the library.

Done :)

I'm also starting up my exercising again :)  Except I keep eating tortilla chips and salsa when I'm not hungry....guilty
That's the part that bothers me, is that I eat when I'm not even hungry.
I don't really eat bad, I just need to know the difference between when I'm hungry and when I need some quality H20.

Have a wonderful weekend full of gorgeous fall colors :)

P.S. I'm thinking of getting a tiny heart tattoo on my pointer finger.


Laura Wynn said...

A tiny heart tattoo!? *swoons* so. Cute. Hope things pick up for ya, S! It's the weekend, after all-reboot, and then take the world by storm!

Laura Wynn said...

Ps- those pictures with the #'s on them "What do you wish for.." and "When you miss someone..." Where did you find those??

Kate said...

Aww, everything's alright :) We all have bad days from time to time but I assure you things will be better tomorrow. I promise you! Also, I totally share in your frustration about the clothes shopping... I hate when I love the look of it on the hanger or it looks nice on someone else, but when I try it on myself it's just. not. right. And a teeny tiny tattoo sounds cute!

Bee Sarah Lee Bailey said...

dude i want to get an anchor on my pointer finger! i am sorry you are stressed sweet dear. i am proud of you of that helps! i get stressed like that as well when it is something my heart is in. just risk it. bc who wants to live life without risk? i adore you!

Kendra Sue said...

New to the blog! I love it. I totally know about the frustrated thing. Have some Ben and Jerry's (a little bad if you are starting a diet- sry for the temptation), watch a little Gilmore Girls, and take a long bath. Life gets a little better when you are cozy and warm. Good luck with everything.

a cat named cat said...

I'm sure it'll all get better :) Just relax! I hope you get your audition tape done - just don't over think it. When you think you're doing worse you usually end up doing worse. The acting books should really help but remember acting's also all about basic instinct. I'm sure you will do great - Good Luck! :) :)