What Is Love? (13)

There was a point in my life where I was perfectly okay with myself.
Recently I actually looked in the mirror and cried because I loved my body.

I love how I felt, I loved how it moved and I loved how it looked.
This feeling never lasts for long.
It's unfortunate.

So here I am again, learning to love my body.
I'm eating relatively clean because I love my body and I want to take care of it.
It doesn't like milk so instead I drink almond milk.
It hates fast food so I have completely erased it from my diet.
It decided it no longer wanted carbonated beverages in it so I cut out soda.
I'm taking care and loving my body.
This is the body that was given to me, it is mine and I will treat it with respect and listen to what it needs.

This year has been the healthiest I have ever been and you know what?
I feel healthy, I feel clean, I feel strong.

I have an obsession with strength and I have always wanted to be strong emotionally and physically.
I once had my tea leaves read and she told me that I had come back strong and that now I was a warrior.
I think that's what first spiked this obsession with strength.
The fact that this lady looked into a cup and knew what I had been through and could see that I came out a better person was amazing.
I needed to keep that strength.
I needed to be a warrior.

Sure I had many, many more ups and downs.  More downs than ups and worse than before.
But having downs makes you more stronger than having the ups, in my opinion.
I'm getting off track here.

What I'm saying is that I love my body and all the amazing things it does for me everyday.
Sure, sometimes I'll look in the mirror and scoff at my love handles or cringe at my boy-ish shape.
But all of that is part of who I am and I need to learn to love that every day.

Lack of posts lately due to trying to remain strong and dealing with life.
♥

What Is Love? (12)

My journey to learn what Love is isn't over yet.  Wait.  I worded that wrong.
My journey to learn what Love is to other people isn't over yet.

As for me?
I think I know what Love is for me.

For me Love is flawed, slushies, sharing hoodies, honesty, trust, teasing, laughter, sex, communication, kisses, hugs, car trips, bickering, fun, hand holding, caring, naps, likes, dislikes, tickles, thoroughly discussing movies and books, tv night, making dinner together, silence, discussions about anything and everything, wanting to be together but knowing when you need your space, you don't have to be together 24/7 (even though you want to be with them at that moment you're not), nerdy, immature, serious, silly, that tight feeling in your chest where you feel like you explode with happiness at any moment...

♥

What Is Love? (11)

First off, that song "I love you, a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck"  has been stuck in my head for days now.....I have no idea why.

Second, I have a habit of pondering love and my relationship while I'm sweeping up other peoples trash at work.
I wonder if I'm doing this whole love thing righ,t even though there is no way to do it right.
I think it's weird that my boyfriend and I don't fight.  We've had minor arguments but they usually contain laughter.  I've been mad at him a few times but that doesn't last long either.
And honestly, it bugs me that he doesn't get jealous.  Ever. Or he's just not showing it.

Are jealousy and arguments apart of  "Love"?

♥

What Is Love? (10)

Love is staying in with someone on a Saturday night, while they're sick, watching "Dinosaur".
Love is letting said sick person hold onto your hoodie for days because it's comforting...and warm :)
Love is researching what is wrong with your diseased eye.
Love is teaching you how to plant beans (because you do not possess a green thumb).

Love is accepting your Gilmore Girls and Sailor Moon obsession.
Love is still loving you when your eye is red and goopy.
Love is volunteering your hands for a massage.
Love is accepting each others future career plans.
♥

What Is Love? (9)

The last time I did a 'Love' post the boy was moving back.
This makes me smile.
Does that mean I've been so swept up in 'love' that I've been neglecting my studies of it?
The word 'love' still is lacking somewhat in my vocabulary, but I let it slip every now and then, when I feel it.

Sometimes.  In a moment.
It could be a weird moment, like when I licked his cheek last week to get him to stop tickling me.
My brain thinks that strange 'L' word, then my heart starts to beat faster and my chest starts to ache and then I get all quiet until it happens, I say those three little words.  I. Love. You.


Love is agreeing to chop onions so your loved one doesn't have to do the crying.
In the end she does anyways, because all the windows are closed and onion smell fills the kitchen.
Love is cooking together in peace.
Love is sitting in a coffee shop together, sharing a piece of carrot cake, while one reads and the other sketches.

Love is saying what you're thinking about instead of holding back.
Love is laughing hysterically at this video....four times.



Love is napping by the other ones side while they're reading, just to be with them.
Love is staying up until 3am discussing names.
♥

P.S. Prepare for a food post soon :) I've been using the mixer a whole lot.  It's part of my family now.

What Is Love? (8)

I am so utterly confused.
How can people wake up after almost 4 years and decide they don't love someone anymore?
How does that even happen?
I understand that people's feelings can change, but you'd think they would change in the beginning not 4 years later.
Yes, I recently heard my friend and her ex-boy broke up.
My mind is boggled.
I never saw how they were together really, but when a couple starts talking about marriage and moves in together........and then one day it's just over.

Sometimes I think that humans aren't supposed to be just one person, but then I realize how would that work? We have feelings.  Can you imagine sharing your loved one with other men/women?
I'm not an insane jealous person, but I'm human, I get jealous.


Conclusion: I am so very confused, more so than before.
I'll be back once I've had more time to think.

♥

P.S. The Boy is back :)
I have mixed feelings about this, but most of them are good.

What Is Love? (7)

I've read a couple books lately that gave me insight on Love.
The authors pretty much captured how I feel sometimes and why I do or say the things I do.

For instance I read "Triple Shot Bettys In Love" by Jody Gehrman (Read "Confessions of a Triple Shot Betty" first)
How can I do this without spoiling it?
Uhhh Alert! Alert! If you plan on reading this book I might spoil it for you..........does that work?


Hero was advising Geena on the subject of 'Love' and the reason that Geena didn't like love was because she hates feeling out of control.
"You can't control love."
"It controls you."

Is that true?
Does Love control people?

I think it controls our feelings.
We can't change how we feel, no matter how hard we try.
At least that's my opinion.

Has anyone read "Dash and Lily's Book of Dares"?
I loved it, but then again I'm a huge Rachel Cohn and David Levithan fan.
In it one of my favorite characters, Boomer, poses the question: "But what if it's not a yes-or-no question?"
Love that is.

Then they go on to discuss meeting the right person at the wrong time, wrong person at the right time and right person at the right time.

I don't really know what I'm getting at here, but it messed with my head an awful lot.
Which is what books are supposed to do.

Dash drew a map, and I'm tempted to draw a similar map.
When I do, I'll share it when you.
He wrote "Love" on a dry erase board and wrote words...everything that comes with love, all over the board until you could no longer see the word "Love".

So I didn't really come to a conclusion in this post.
I've just confused myself even more.
♥

What Is Love? (6)

Love is teaching someone something new and not losing your patience once.
Love is learning something new because you want to know why your loved one loves it so much.
Love is being half asleep and telling someone that you'll miss them.

Love is getting mad at your mom while playing a video game together but laughing over it later.
Love is your mom saying "Yay! More S time" when your plans with a friend get cancelled.

Love is meeting someone at the train station when they get off work, just because.

I'm still trying to decide if love is sharing a cold.
Yes, I am sick courtesy of the boy.
♥

What Is Love? (5)

Love is tugging the back of someone's shirt down when it rides up so they don't get cold.

Love is waiting with someone at the bus stop even though it's freezing out.
Love is giving that person who's waiting with you your jacket.

♥

What Is Love? (4)

Just a quote and pictures today :)

Wise Ol' Merlin from "The Sword in the Stone"

"You know lad, that love business is a powerful thing."

Wart: "Greater than gravity?"

"Well yes boy in it's way I'd say it's the greatest force on Earth."

♥

What Is Love? (3)

Just watched this week's episode of The Walking Dead

Love is someone telling you they might move back home and you are torn because you would like them to but that's selfish and you would like them to be successful where they are living now.

Love is also agreeing that you need cheeseburgers at midnight.
♥
I'm kinda liking Cage the Elephant's new single "Shake Me Down".

What Is Love? (2)

Tonight my Mom announced that she thinks my brother is in love.
I'm not sure what the exact topic of conversation was but it had to do with him and she said, quote, "I guess it's love that makes you go dumb."
It amused me, yes.
I rolled my eyes; I've been retreating back to my cynical self lately.

Later on we discovered he left his ipod at home while he went out with her.
"He must be in love," I said.
This is a boy who always has a stupid ear bud stuck to the side of his head.

Love is supposed to make you happy and he is.

And the person you love is supposed to make you a better person, he hasn't changed much...I guess that's good, I just wish he would do more chores.  Haha.

I need to start asking people what love is.

Some people say you shouldn't question it, you just know.
That sounds a bit ridiculous to me.
Of course you're going to question it, and then one day it'll SMACK! hit you in the face.

I don't like that I question love.
I used to be a romantic to the max, then I was insanely cynical, then this summer I found a happy medium...now I'm so confused.

All these thoughts of love are swimming about my brain lately.
I think I understand that "in love" thing a bit more now.
You can love someone and be friends, but to be in love with someone is something entirely different...correct?

I've made a goal to learn a lot more on people's (mostly my family) views on love.
I want to know what little things the one they/you love does for you that lets you know they love you, or what you do for them.
To me it's not saying "I love you", it's someone getting you a blanket before you can even ask because they know you're always cold.  That kind of thing.
Or seeing leaves blow across the road and then in that moment wishing they were there.

♥

What Is Love? (1)

Love is when you're at the hospital with an allergic reaction and your husband comes in and immediately asks where you are.

I witnessed this by my Dad tonight.
You could just see the look of slight panic on his face and he wanted to know where my Mom was and how she was doing.
It's hard to describe the look, but to me that was a look of love.
♥
P.S. sitting in the E.R. reminds me of the tv show "ER" so I was giving the nurses/doctors character names to keep my Momma occupied.

I'm going to attempt to make this a regular thing, this "what is love?" thing, mainly because it's a goal in life to let myself accept what love is I guess?...But also because I see many sweet things done by couples especially when I'm at work.  The older couples are so sweet :)